Privilege - Meme

[deborahjross]

For me, this reflects not privilege, but passion:

Bold the items that apply to you.
1. Father went to college
On scholarship, while working 2 jobs.
2. Father finished college
No, but he seriously endangered his health before he gave up.
3. Mother went to college
She was admitted on scholarship, but her parents insisted she work to help support the family.
4. Mother finished college
5. Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor
My brother's a professor (of philosophy) at an East Coast state university; I was named for a cousin who was one of the first female cardiologists
6. Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers
To quote norilana: Huh?
7. Had more than 50 books in your childhood home
8. Had more than 500 books in your childhood home
I'm not sure our tiny house was big enough.
9. Were read children's books by a parent
10. Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18
Dance and art, the latter free through the school district, as a child, horseback riding as a teen (which I paid for by babysitting)
11. Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18
12. The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively
Well, certainly not during the 1950s. We were definitely personae non gratae -- did I spell that right?
13. Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18
Are you kidding? I don't think credit cards existed, except department store "charge plates"
14. Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs
15. Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs
16. Went to a private high school
17. Went to summer camp
18. Had a private tutor before you turned 18
19. Family vacations involved staying at hotels
20. Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18
How about, Most of your clothing was handmade by your mom?
21. Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them
22. There was original art in your house when you were a child
And some of it was mine, proudly displayed
23. Had a phone in your room before you turned 18
24. You and your family lived in a single family house
25. Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home
26. You had your own room as a child
27. Participated in an SAT/ACT prep course
28. Had your own TV in your room in High School
29. Owned [an investment] in High School or College
30. Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16
32. Went on more than one cruise with your family
33. Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up
Especially my mom, who loved Impressionist art. I have wonderful memories of wandering through museums with her as a small child.
34. You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family
But we never ate in restaurants, rarely went to movies. I never knew this was unusual until I got to college.

rbowspryte added these questions:

35. I am for the most part healthy and have no significant disability.
36. I have been born into a gender which I am comfortable with.
?37. My sexuality is viewed positively in the media and by the majority of my society.?
My sexuality is none of their damned business.
38. My sexuality is not visible to others just by looking at me.
?39. My peer group is represented positively in the media and embraced positively by the majority of society.?
Which peer group? Female fantasy writers? Buddhist/Quaker Jews? Peace-loving tree-huggers? Red Diaper babies?
40. My ethnic group is represented positively in the media and rarely stigmatized or stereotyped.
Anti-semitism is still alive and well in the USA, as I know from personal experience
41. The language spoken by teachers in school was the same language as that I spoke with my family at home.
42. My parents and teachers took it for granted that I would attend university.
43. Any money I earned at part-time jobs before I turned 18 was mine to keep or put towards my education.
44. I know what my family's genetic history is.
45. When people see me with my parents, they assume we're related.
It's been so long since this was possible, my heart aches. But it is definitely true for my sister and also my kids.
46. I graduated from college or university with no debt.
You've got to be kidding!
47. During college or university, I could use income from part-time jobs to supplement my spending money (rather than for tuition, books, or living expenses).

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/la_marquise_de_/]

That's a fascinating set of questions. I'm contemplating what a British equivalent would look like (we don;t tend to have summer camp, university funding underwent a massive change from state- to private- funded in the 80s, and our class system is famously arcane).

[deborahjross.livejournal.com]

Yes, do formulate a British version -- the differences will be fascinating! Many of the questions, especially in the first part, are looking at economic markers for privilege/class, but miss how the emphasis on education and the arts in certain ethnic groups (in my case, Jewish immigrants) can give a skewed result. So I answered Yes to questions about books, museums, art and arts classes, but we were by no means rich. We weren't abjectly poor -- we were able to buy a suburban tract house when I was about 5 -- but those choices were largely about priorities.

Some of the questions showed me an interesting dichotomy. On the surface, I'm "acceptable" -- I'm white, educated, articulate, not disabled, married. However, for most of my life, I have lived with "unacceptable" secrets. My parents were Communist Party members in the 1930s, and our family was a target of a McCarthy era witch hunt. (The Justice Department filed a denaturalization suit to take away my father's citizenship, based on utterly trumped-up charges, but really because he was a rabble-rousing union organizer.) We never went underground, but our cousins did, and our home was a "safe house."

My kids grew up in a family of three committed adults, under the guise of a traditionally married couple plus housemate. For various reasons, including professional security clearances, housemate's status was kept private. And then there's my 25 years training in Chinese martial arts. All those people who thought I was just a sweet, middle-class, PTA (school) mom had no idea.... (My kids, btw, are of the opinion they got by far the best deal, having 3 parents. They certainly turned out open-minded!)

[http://users.livejournal.com/la_marquise_de_/]

I shall give thought to the UL version.
I sometimes think that the 'normal' s in fact the rare. My family were left wing in a conservative area (though my mother made a point of proclaiming this); we always had the wrong accent -- we moved around a lot; but the big secret was the violence in the household. I find it hard to type that, even now. We looked normal, but...

[deborahjross.livejournal.com]

It takes courage to tell the truth about something like family violence. (Or alcoholism, or sexual abuse, or mental illness...) The bottom line is that until we do, we can't heal. "We're only as sick as our secrets," is too often true.

[http://users.livejournal.com/la_marquise_de_/]

"We're only as sick as our secrets," is too often true.
I hadn't heard that one before, but indeed, very very true.