Difficult times

[deborahjross]

Dave's mom has been in and out of hospital and nursing homes for a couple of months now. Over the weekend, she deteriorated significantly, and at this time, it looks unlikely that she will recover. I'm trying to keep a calm, loving center for Dave while he walks through this. So, may not say much for a while.

Comments

[otana.livejournal.com]

We're thinking of the two of you and Dave's mom. I hope her passing is peaceful and painless.

[deborahjross.livejournal.com]

Thank you. She seems to be comfortable, although drifting in and out of consciousness. They have her on meds to control her agitation and I don't think she's in physical pain. Each time, she seems more confused, although she still knows her name and recognizes her family. I'll try to visit tomorrow and maybe read some poetry or a children's story to her. Even if she's not responsive, she may on some level be able to hear my voice.

[christymarx.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry. [[hugs]] to you and Dave.

[patchwork-prose.livejournal.com]

I will be holding you all in the Light.

love & hugs . . .

[kateelliott.livejournal.com]

my heartfelt wishes for the best all around - whatever that may be - to Dave, and strength to you to keep that calm center for him. I went through a similar situation recently with my father in law. many hugs to you all.

[styxchyk.livejournal.com]

Deborah, you both have my hugs and peaceful thoughts.

Heather

[deborahjross.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Christy. It's a complex and difficult time, and knowing we have caring friends makes a big difference.

[deborahjross.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Elizabeth. Last night, Dave and I sat in silent worship together, a deeply nourishing space for me. It helps me to see his mother as a child of Light, a woman who has suffered dreadfully from the disease of alcoholism all her life and who is now on the brink of the unknown, confused and frightened, deserving of my compassion and my prayers.

[deborahjross.livejournal.com]

You're exactly right -- whatever that may be. I do so much better when I let go of my own ideas of how things "should be" and trust that things are unfolding as they must, that each of us has the emotional and resources to do whatever we are given to do. My own experiences, painful as they have been, help me to trust, to remember that when I am open in this way, unexpected blessings come to me. Certainly, the best way I can help Dave is to take care of myself in this way.

[deborahjross.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Heather. Peaceful thoughts are a blessing.

[equesgal.livejournal.com]

I'm holding you two in my thoughts and may Dave's mother's passing into the West be as peaceful as possible.

[galeni.livejournal.com]

You have my sympathies. My roommate is going through something similar right now. Hugs to you all.

[deborahjross.livejournal.com]

Sue, I visited her in the hospital today and read aloud, a newspaper article on the local Quakers (including quotes from Dave), Shakespeare sonnets and a little Thich Nhat Hahn. She drifted in and out. They have her on Haldol for agitation, so she's pretty peaceful. No idea how long this could or will go on.

I think the reading did as much for me as for her, but she seemed to enjoy the sound of my voice.

[deborahjross.livejournal.com]

Hugs back, Caryn. And do take care of yourself and maintain healthy boundaries with your roommate.